Friday, August 22, 2014

[Hindi Jokes] Digest Number 3433

3 Messages

Digest #3433
(no subject) by "Arpen" arpen90
Re: Shyaris, Jokes, Quote (13.07.14) by "SHIVAJI ANGAJ" shivajiangaj
Hindi Jokes] Shayarisssss by shree_shreeshyam


Thu Aug 21, 2014 4:04 am (PDT) . Posted by:

"Arpen" arpen90

आज जब मैंने आईना बननेकी एक कोशिश की..
तब समझमे आया आइना बनाना आसान नहीं है
सचपे पर्दा गिरना,झूठ से पर्दा उठाना आसान नहीं है
रेखा पटेल ( विनोदिनी )

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Friday, August 15, 2014

[Hindi Jokes] Digest Number 3432

4 Messages

Digest #3432
Jokes, Shayaris Quotes (14.08.14) by "Mahesh Popat"
Msg is long but pls read it n think about it. by "Mahesh Popat"
Shayaris, Jokes, Quote (14.08.14) by "Mahesh Popat"


Thu Aug 14, 2014 6:08 am (PDT) . Posted by:

"Mahesh Popat"



Baap of allSBI Bank: 
Humara bank aapko bina interest ke loan de raha hai....
Agar dene mein interest hi nahi hai to kyu de rahe ho? Nahi chahiye....


One of the best message:

In a battle, a soldier went to bring his wounded friend back frm field.
His Captain said,
" Its of No use! ur friend must b dead".

But soldier still goes & brings back his friend.Seeing dead body, Captain says
"I told u its of no worth. He's dead".
The soldier replies:"No sir, it was really worth. When I got to him, my friend saw me, smiled & said his last words:
Dedicated to all Great friends.on freindship day.


Kal raat meri biwi ne mujh se kaha ki tum toh ek dum Hritik jaise lagte ho...........
Maine saaf saaf bol diya ki mere paas sirf 400 rupaye hi hain


तेरे होठों में भी क्या खूब नशा मिला....

यू लगता है तेरे जूठे पानी से ही शराब बनती है....


Every morning I get up and 
look through the Forbes list of the richest people in america.
If I'm not there, I go to work. 


Average distance a man walks in a mall if he

A. goes all by himself - 300 metres

B. is accompanied by his wife or girlfriend - 3 kilometers


किसी की मजबूरियाँ पे न हँसिये , 

कोई मजबूरियाँ ख़रीद कर नहीं लाता । 
कोई घरवालो के दबाव में भी शादी करता है


Thu Aug 14, 2014 6:11 am (PDT) . Posted by:

"Mahesh Popat"


Amazing and a must read
Ant and Grosshopper - Indian Version of story - too good and fact

Original Story: 
The Ant works hard in the withering heat all summer building its house andlaying up supplies for the winter. The Grasshopper thinks the Ant is a fooland laughs dances plays the summer away. Come winter, the Ant is warm andwell fed. The Grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in thecold.

Indian Version:
The Ant works hard in the withering heat all summer building its house andlaying up supplies for the winter. The Grasshopper thinks the Ant's a fooland laughs dances plays the summer away.
Come winter, the shivering Grasshopper calls a press conference and demandsto know why the Ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while othersare cold and starving.
NDTV, BBC, CNN , Asianet show up to provide pictures of the shivering Grasshoppernext to a video of the Ant in his comfortable home with a table filled withfood.
The World is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be that this poorGrasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Arundhati Roy stages a demonstration in front of the Ant's house.
Medha Patkar goes on a fast along with other Grasshoppers demanding thatGrasshoppers be relocated to warmer climates during winter .
Mayawati states this as 'injustice' done on Minorities.
Amnesty International and Koffi Annan criticize the Indian Government fornot upholding the fundamental rights of the Grasshopper.
The Internet is flooded with online petitions seeking support to theGrasshopper (many promising Heaven & Everlasting Peace for prompt supportas against the wrath of God for non-compliance) .
Opposition MPs stage a walkout. Left parties call for 'Bengal Bandh' inWest Bengal and Kerala demanding a Judicial Enquiry.
CPM in Kerala immediately passes a law preventing Ants from working hard inthe heat so as to bring about equality of poverty among Ants andGrasshoppers.
Railway minister allocates one free coach to Grasshoppers on all Indian RailwayTrains, aptly named as the 'Grasshopper Rath'.
Finally, the Judicial Committee drafts the 'Prevention of Terrorism AgainstGrasshoppers Act'[POTAGA] , with effect from the beginning of the winter..
Education minister makes 'Special Reservation' for Grasshoppers in EducationalInstitutions in Government Services.
The Ant is fined for failing to comply with POTAGA and having nothing leftto pay his retroactive taxes, it's home is confiscated by the Governmentand handed over to the Grasshopper in a ceremony covered by NDTV, BBC, CNN.
Arundhati Roy calls it 'A Triumph of Justice'.
Railway minister calls it 'Socialistic Justice'.
CPM calls it the 'Revolutionary Resurgence of the Downtrodden'
Koffi Annan invites the Grasshopper to address the UN General Assembly.

Many years later...
The Ant has since migrated to the US and set up a multi-billion dollarcompany in Silicon Valley ,
100s of Grasshoppers still die of starvation despite reservation somewherein India ,
As a result of losing lot of hard working Ants and feeding thegrasshoppers, India is still a developing country...!!

I have no idea from whose creative mind this has come from, but this piece is awesome..

Thu Aug 14, 2014 6:18 am (PDT) . Posted by:

"Mahesh Popat"


Msg is long but pls read it n think about it.

A friend of mine opened his wife's wardrobe and picked up a silk paper wrapped package:

'This,' he said, 'isn't any ordinary package.'

He unwrapped the box and stared at both the silk paper and the box n silk satin night dresses inside.

'She got this the first time we went to New York , 8 or 9 years ago. She has never put it on , was saving it for a special occasion.

Well, I guess this is it.

He got near the bed and placed the gift box next to the other clothing he was taking to the funeral house, his wife had just died.

He turned to me and said:

'Never save something for a special occasion.

Every day in your life is a special occasion'.

I still think those words changed my life.

Now I read more and clean less.

I sit on the porch without worrying about anything.

I spend more time with my family, and less at work.

I understood that life should be a source of experience to be lived up to, not survived through.

I no longer keep anything.

I use crystal glasses every day...

I'll wear new clothes to go to the supermarket, if I feel like it.

I don't save my special perfume for special occasions, I use it whenever I want to.

The words 'Someday....' and ' One Day...' are fading away from my dictionary.
If it's worth seeing, listening or doing, I want to see, listen or do it now....

I don't know what my friend's wife would have done if she knew she wouldn't be there the next morning, this nobody can tell.

I think she might have called her relatives and closest friends.
She might call old friends to make peace over past quarrels.

I'd like to think she would go out for Chinese, her favorite food.

It's these small things that I would regret not doing, if I knew my time had come..

Each day, each hour, each minute, is special.

Live for today, for tomorrow is promised to no-one..

If you got this, it's because someone cares for you and because, probably, there's someone you care about.

If you're too busy to send this out to other people and you say to yourself that you will send it'One of these days' , remember that 'One day' is far away... or might never come.....

Do forward if you like !

Thu Aug 14, 2014 6:26 am (PDT) . Posted by:

"Mahesh Popat"



ज़िन्दगी भी अजीब है......

ऑफिस जाने का मन किसी को नहीं, लेकिन पहुचने की जल्दी सबको हैं.....।


कठोर सत्य..
बारात मे दुल्हे को सबसे पीछे

और दुनिया आगे चलती है,

शव यात्रा मे व्यक्ति को आगे

और दुनिया पीछे चलती है..

यानि दुनिया खुशी मे आगेऔर दुख मे पीछे हो जाती है..!


 आज का सत्य :
पहचान कहा हो पाती है अब इंसानों की !!
अब तो गाड़ी, कपड़े, और जुते लोगों की औकात तय करते है !!!!!


Jab bhi wife mera photo apne mobile se click karti hai mujhe bahut dar lagta hai........
Saala aaj kal OLX aur Quikr ki advertisement bahut aati hai


What is the best example of 'once in a lifetime' opportunity?
A Mosquito lands on your wife's face & you get the rarest opportunity of your life..
Never miss it!! ;)


तुम बहुत सुन्दर लग रही हो ..i love you darling.. "

परिवार की शांति के लिए बोले जाने वाले इस झूठ का पाप नही लगता- 


 A donkey  goes to GUINESS BOOK OFFICE to check,

If He's Still The Most Stupid Animal on Earth Or Not?😜 

He Came Out Angrly Shouting- Who is Alia .......😡😡


 दो अक्षर की "मौत" और तीन अक्षर के "जीवन" में 

ढाई अक्षर का "दोस्त" बाज़ी मार जाता हैं..


मुझे एक ज़िन्दगी और दे दे खुदा....
ये वाली तो..........
WhatsApp में यूं ही कट जाएगी...

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Monday, August 11, 2014

[Hindi Jokes] Digest Number 3431

2 Messages

Digest #3431
Jokes, Quote (10.08.14) by "Mahesh Popat"
Shayaris, Jokes, Quote (10.08.14) by "Mahesh Popat"


Sun Aug 10, 2014 5:20 am (PDT) . Posted by:

"Mahesh Popat"



 एक आदमी ने सौ बार खूनदान करके'रिकार्ड बनाया।
ब्लड बैंक वालो ने यह कहते हुएउसकी 'पत्नी को पुरस्कार दिया:-
"आपने नही पिया, तभी तो हमने लिया।


Company Sales Officer tension mai tha..
Distributor : kya hua ??
Sales Officer: mai 6 months se tour pe tha,, wife pregnant ho gyi "
Distributor : beta ab pta chala, bina order k maal aata hai to kaisa lagta hai...


Man reading newspaper..
News:"Indian athlete lost gold medal in long jump"
Man comments:Idiot !!Who told him to wear gold medal while jumping ....


This is CLASSIC...Girls read n ENJOY!!A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. 

Suddenly her husband burst into the kitchen."Careful ... CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! 
Oh my GOD! You're cooking too many at once. 

TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter.

Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to getMORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK!Careful ... CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL!

You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! 

Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST yourmind? Don't forget to salt them. 

You know you always forget to salt them.
Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!"
The wife stared at him with anger.
"What the HELL IS WRONG with you? 
You think I DON'T KNOW how to fry a couple of eggs?" 
The husband calmly replied, 
"I wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving!"


Zyada Gussa tab aata hai jab Life ki har taraf se lagi padi ho,
Aur fir koi aakar ye bol de, Sahi me yaar 
Zindagi k asli maze to tu le raha hai


Agar Chai Acchi Bani Ho Toh Usse English Mein Kya Kahenge?? 
Santa - Property


Santa shadi k agle din biwi ko peet raha tha.
Logo ne pucha to wo bola isne meri chai me taaviz milaya hai 
muje bas me karne k liye.
Biwi rote hue gusse se boli-O tea bag tha kutte ....


इंसान भी कितना अनोखा जीव है

पहले भिखारी बन कर,भगवान से हाथ जोड़ कर मांगता है!

फिर गर्व से उसी भगवान को दान देकर,

नीचे अपना नाम लिखा करअपनी श्रेष्ठता सिद्ध करता है!!!


Sun Aug 10, 2014 5:25 am (PDT) . Posted by:

"Mahesh Popat"



तेरा घमंड तो चार दीन का हे पगली,

हमारी बादसाही तो खानदानी है।

अग़र मोहब्बत हे,तो शक़ कैसा..!.. अगर नहीं है, तो हक्क़ कैसा..!!


माना कि तेरे शहर में ग़रीब कम होंगे ,,

अगर बिकी तेरी दोस्ती तो पहले ख़रीददार हम होंगे ….

तुझे ख़बर न होगी तेरी क़ीमत पर ,,

पर तुझे पाकर सबसे अमीर हम होंगे……….!!


A Toyota or a BMW, the Road remains the same for all.

You Travel Economy Class or Executive, your Destination doesn't change.

A Titan, Rado or a Rolex, the Time is the same for everyone.

There is nothing wrong in dreaming or leading a luxurious life;

What needs to be taken care of is ,not to let the NEED to become a GREED.

Because need is always met but greed is never fulfilled! 


"Wife : Truth or dare?

Husband : Truth.

She: Do i look fat in this new dress? 

He : This is cheating, i asked for truth not for dare." 


अजब जज्बा है जवानी मैं इश्क़ करने का,

उम्र जीने की है ओर शौक मरने का.........


उसने हमे एक और दर्द दिया तो हमें याद आया.....
के दुआओं में हमने ही तो उसके सारे दर्द मांगे थे...


 तुने तो रुला के रख दिया ए-जिन्दगी, 

जा कर पूछ मेरी माँ से कितने लाडले थे हम…


 How true is this,
Real reason why whatsapp is valued at 19 billion dollars.... ......Whatsapp cracked the biggest problem of humanity - 

" ladies baat bhi kar le aur awaaz bhi na ho "


Ek tha Tiger - # Salman Khan - #200 crores

# Chennai Express - # Srk - #250 crores

# Dhoom 3 - # Aamir khan  #300 crores

# Suzanne - No movie - #400 crores

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Sunday, August 10, 2014

[Hindi Jokes] Digest Number 3430

1 Message

Digest #3430
Re: Shyaris, Jokes, Quote (13.07.14) by "Zulfi_afzal" zulfi_afzal


Sat Aug 9, 2014 4:33 am (PDT) . Posted by:

"Zulfi_afzal" zulfi_afzal

Yaar apne toh rulaya.

Sent from Samsung Mobile

"rakesh batta [Hindi_Jokes]" <> wrote:

my tears are coming out really superb

On Sunday, July 27, 2014 1:28 PM, " [Hindi_Jokes]" <> wrote:

Good joke
Well done keep it up
Sent on my BlackBerry® from Vodafone
From: "Mahesh Popat [Hindi_Jokes]" <>
Date: Sun, 13 Jul 2014 08:27:37 -0700
To: <>
ReplyTo: Mahesh Popat <>
Subject: [Hindi Jokes] Shyaris, Jokes, Quote (13.07.14)




कितनी अलग हैं उनकी फितरत में अंदाज़ ऐ मोहब्बत।

रोज़ एक ज़ख्म देकर कहते हैं अपना ख्याल रखना।।


गिरा दे जितना पानी है तेरी आगोश में...
ऐ बादल...

ये प्यास किसी के मिलने से ही बुझेगी....
तेरे बरसने से नहीं....



Beautifull lines by sweet daughter....

Sham ho gai
ghumne chalo na papa ....!!

Chalte chalte thak gai
kandhe pe bitha lo na papa ....!!

Andhere se dar lagta hai
Seene se laga lo na papa ....!!

Mummy toh so gai
Aap hi thapki dekar sula do na papa ....!!

School toh puri hui
College jaane do na papa ....!!

College mei chhoti si galti ho gai
maaf kar do na papa ....!!

Chhoti si bhul ki itni badi saza
jab doli mein bitha hi diya to
aansu to mat bahao na
papa ....!!

Aapki muskurahat acchi hai
ek bar muskurao na papa ....!!

Aapne meri har baat maani
ek bat aur maan bhi jao na papa ....!!

Iss dharti pe bojh nahi hu mai
Duniya ko smjhao na papa ....


पूजा की थाली बनानी हो अगर 

भूखे की थाली में रोटी डाल दो 
महेश दुबे


तेरे संग भीँगू मैँ मोहब्बत की बरसात मेँ.........

खुदा करे उसके बाद तुजे इश्क का बुखार हो जाए ...🎭


I think RBI should declare "Eclairs" as the new one Rupee and 
"Chloromint&quot; as the new 50 Paisa.

Saala har dukandaar chhutte ki jagah yahi deta hai...!!


Ye JOKE Padhoge To Haste-Haste Gir Jaoge..:-)
Isliye bheja hi nahi..

Gir gaye to..?

I care for you !!


अब कहा जरुरत है हाथों मे पत्थर उठाने की,

तोडने वाले तो जुबान से ही दिल तोड देते हैं.....


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