Messages
Sun Jul 27, 2014 12:52 am (PDT) . Posted by:
CHAK DE
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This is killer...
'With Modi govt, even Ishant Sharma performs'
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Put your wife in a room & lock it.Put your dog in another room & lock it !!!Open both rooms after 2 - 3 hours & see who is Happy to see you,
and who will BITE you !
(Group members are advised not to try this at home
as these stunts were performed by professionals;
who are now!divorced; and living happily with their dog)
Don't laugh loud ----
The extended version says...
Put your husband in a room & lock it.Put your dog in another room & lock it !!!
Open both rooms after 2 - 3 hours & you will be happy to see your dog waiting for you.. but you be angry looking at your husband sleeping like he never slept before
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इतना भी गुमान न कर अपनी जीत पर "ए बेखबर"
शहर में तेरी जीत से ज़्यादा चर्चे तो मेरी हार के है.
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दुनिया में बहुत से लोग आईना देख कर डर जाते,
अगर आईने में चेहरा नहीं चरित्र दिखाई देता.
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Teacher asked her young students to get their parents
to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it.
The next day, the kids came back and one by one, began to tell their stories.
There were all the regular types of stuff.
But then the teacher realised that only Janie was left.
"Janie, do you have a story to share ?'
''Yes madam......My daddy told me a story aboutmy Mom.
She was a Marine pilot in Operation Desert Storm in Iraq
and her plane got hit.
She had to bail out over enemy territory
and all she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol and a survival knife.
She drank the whiskey on the way down so the bottle wouldn't break
and then her parachute landed her right in the middle of 20 Iraqi troops.
She shot 15 of them with the pistol, until she ran out of bullets, killed four more with the knife,
till the blade broke and then she killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands.
''Good Heavens,' said the horrified teacher.
'What did your Daddy tell you was the moral to this horrible story ?
"Stay away from Mommy when she's drunk......!!!!"
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Ab Mai News mein aata hoon;
Gharo mein nahi.
~ Tamatar.
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"मेरे दोस्त बरबाद होगे तो सिर्फतिन पत्ती और कैंडी क्रश की वजह से....
वरना शराब की क्या ओकात जो बरबाद कर दे..!!"
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Sun Jul 27, 2014 12:54 am (PDT) . Posted by:
Good joke
Well done keep it up
Sent on my BlackBerry® from Vodafone
-----Original Message-----
From: "Mahesh Popat mahesh_popat@ymail.com [Hindi_Jokes]" <Hindi_Jokes-noreply@yahoogroups.com>
Sender: Hindi_Jokes@yahoogroups.com
Date: Sun, 13 Jul 2014 08:27:37
To: <Hindi_Jokes@yahoogroups.com>
Reply-To: Mahesh Popat <mahesh_popat@ymail.com>
Subject: [Hindi Jokes] Shyaris, Jokes, Quote (13.07.14)
CHAK DE
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कितनी अलग हैं उनकी फितरत में अंदाज़ ऐ मोहब्बत।
रोज़ एक ज़ख्म देकर कहते हैं अपना ख्याल रखना।।
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गिरा दे जितना पानी है तेरी आगोश में...ऐ बादल...
ये प्यास किसी के मिलने से ही बुझेगी....तेरे बरसने से नहीं....
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Superb
Beautifull lines by sweet daughter....
Sham ho gaighumne chalo na papa ....!!
Chalte chalte thak gaikandhe pe bitha lo na papa ....!!
Andhere se dar lagta haiSeene se laga lo na papa ....!!
Mummy toh so gaiAap hi thapki dekar sula do na papa ....!!
School toh puri huiCollege jaane do na papa ....!!
College mei chhoti si galti ho gaimaaf kar do na papa ....!!
Chhoti si bhul ki itni badi sazajab doli mein bitha hi diya toaansu to mat bahao napapa ....!!
Aapki muskurahat acchi haiek bar muskurao na papa ....!!
Aapne meri har baat maaniek bat aur maan bhi jao na papa ....!!
Iss dharti pe bojh nahi hu maiDuniya ko smjhao na papa ....
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पूजा की थाली बनानी हो अगर
भूखे की थाली में रोटी डाल दो महेश दुबे
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तेरे संग भीँगू मैँ मोहब्बत की बरसात मेँ.........
खुदा करे उसके बाद तुजे इश्क का बुखार हो जाए ...🎭
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I think RBI should declare "Eclairs" as the new one Rupee and
"Chloromint" as the new 50 Paisa.
Saala har dukandaar chhutte ki jagah yahi deta hai...!!
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Ye JOKE Padhoge To Haste-Haste Gir Jaoge..:-)...............Isliye bheja hi nahi..
Gir gaye to..?
I care for you !!
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अब कहा जरुरत है हाथों मे पत्थर उठाने की,
तोडने वाले तो जुबान से ही दिल तोड देते हैं.....
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Sun Jul 27, 2014 12:56 am (PDT) . Posted by:
thanks for the beautiful emails.
regret i cannot read hindi script
Yes URDU text i can read.
thanks again for the lovely stuff yu send out.
much appreciated
On Wednesday, July 16, 2014 10:26 AM, "Mahesh Popat mahesh_popat@ymail.com [Hindi_Jokes]" <Hindi_Jokes-noreply@yahoogroups.com> wrote:
CHAK DE
Lines by Gulzar----
जब मैं छोटा था,
शायद दुनिया बहुत बड़ी हुआ करती थी..
मुझे याद है
मेरे घर से "स्कूल" तक का वो रास्ता,
क्या क्या नहीं था वहां,
चाट के ठेले, जलेबी की दुकान, बर्फ के गोले
सब कुछ,
अब वहां "मोबाइल शॉप", "विडियो पार्लर" हैं,
फिर भी सब सूना है..
शायद अब दुनिया सिमट रही है...
.
.
.
जब मैं छोटा था,
शायद शामें बहुत लम्बी हुआ करती थीं...
मैं हाथ में पतंग की डोर पकड़े,
घंटों उड़ा करता था,
वो लम्बी "साइकिल रेस",
वो बचपन के खेल,
वो हर शाम थक के चूर हो जाना,
अब शाम नहीं होती,
दिन ढलता है
और सीधे रात हो जाती है.
शायद वक्त सिमट रहा है..
जब मैं छोटा था,
शायद दोस्ती बहुत गहरी हुआ करती थी,
दिन भर वो हुजूम बनाकर खेलना,
वो दोस्तों के घर का खाना,
वो लड़कियों की बातें,
वो साथ रोना...
अब भी मेरे कई दोस्त हैं,
पर दोस्ती जाने कहाँ है,
जब भी "traffic signal" पर मिलते हैं
"Hi" हो जाती है,
और अपने अपने रास्ते चल देते हैं,
होली, दीवाली, जन्मदिन,
नए साल पर
बस SMS आ जाते हैं,
शायद अब रिश्ते बदल रहें हैं..
.ं
जब मैं छोटा था,
तब खेल भी अजीब हुआ करते थे,
छुपन छुपाई, लंगडी टांग, पोषम पा, टिप्पी टीपी टाप.
अब
internet, office, से फुर्सत ही नहीं मिलती..
शायद ज़िन्दगी बदल रही है.
.
.
जिंदगी का सबसे बड़ा सच यही है..
जो अकसर क़ब्रिस्तान के बाहर बोर्ड पर लिखा होता है...
"मंजिल तो यही थी,
बस जिंदगी गुज़र गयी मेरी यहाँ आते आते"
.
ज़िंदगी का लम्हा बहुत छोटा सा है...
कल की कोई बुनियाद नहीं है
और आने वाला कल सिर्फ सपने में ही है..
अब बच गए इस पल में..
तमन्नाओं से भर इस जिंदगी में
हम सिर्फ भाग रहे हैं.
कुछ रफ़्तार धीमी करो,
मेरे दोस्त,
और
इस ज़िंदगी को जियो..
खूब जियो मेरे दोस्त.....
Sun Jul 27, 2014 12:57 am (PDT) . Posted by:
really your shayari is wonderful thanks
On Friday, July 18, 2014 9:31 AM, "Mahesh Popat mahesh_popat@ymail.com [Hindi_Jokes]" <Hindi_Jokes-noreply@yahoogroups.com> wrote:
CHAK DE
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Upwaas karke agar Bhagwaan khush hote...
Toh duniya mein sabse jyaada khush Bhikari hote
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Chintu failed in the final Law Exam & decided to make a deal with the Professor.
Chintu: Sir, Can I ask you one question?
Professor: Yes.
Chintu: If you can answer this question, I will accept my final marks, if you cant, you will have to give me an "A" grading.
Professor agreed.
.
.
.
Chintu asked: "What is legal but not logical, logical but not legal & neither legal nor logical?"
Prof thought about it for hrs & pondered but couldnt think of an answer.
He had to finally give up as he really didnot know the answer.
He gave this boy an "A" grading as promised.
The following day, Professor asked same question to his students.
He was shocked when all of them raised their hands.
He asked one student.
He answered:
Sir, you are 65, married to a 28 yrs old woman, this is legal but not logical.
Your wife, is having an affair with a 23 year old boy, this is logical but not legal.
Your wife's boyfriend has failed in his exam & yet you have given him an "A", this is neither logical nor legal.
.
.
Professor behosh.....
l am laughing since past 5 minutes, can't resist from sharing it
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A young man excitedly tells his mother he's fallen in love and is going to get married.
He says, "Just for fun, Ma, I'm going to bring over three women and you try and guess which one I'm going to marry."
The mother agrees and the next day he brings three beautiful women into the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for a while.
He then says, "Ok, Ma. Guess which one I'm going to marry." She immediately replies, "the one in the middle."
He was surprised that his mother was so easily able to guess the correct woman,
"How do you know?!"
The mother replies, "I don't like she!"
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खामोशियाँ कर दे बयां तो बात अलग है .....!!
कुछ दर्द है जो लफ्जो में उतारे नहीं जाते ..... !!
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माना की खुद चलके आयें हैं तेरी देहलीज़ पे...
इश्क
सीतम...... सीतम..... और सीतम
ये कहाँ की मेहमान नवाजी है..??
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शराब और इश्क़ कि फितरत एक सी है ,
दोनों में वोही नशा , वोही दिलकशी ;
एक दिन तौबा करो उनसे ,
दुसरे दिन फिर वोही दीवानगी ,
फिर वोही खुदखुशी
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भूल सकते हो तो भूल जाओ ,
इजाज़त है तुम्हे,
न भूल पाओ तो लौट आना ,
एक और भूल कि इजाज़त है तुम्हे…
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टूटे हुए सपनो और छुटे हुए अपनों ने मार दिया...
वरना ख़ुशी खुद हमसे मुस्कुराना सिखने आया करती थी..........
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हुए बदनाम मगर फिर भी न सुधर पाए हम
फिर वही शायरी फिर वही इश्क फिर वही तुम
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Sun Jul 27, 2014 12:59 am (PDT) . Posted by:
CHAK DE
In the hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where their Family member lay gravely ill. Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber. 'I'm afraid I'm the bearer of bad news,' he said as hesurveyed the worried faces.
'The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain Transplant. It's an experimental procedure, very risky but it is the only hope. Insurance will cover the procedure, but you will have to pay for the Brain yourselves.'
The family members sat silently as they absorbed the news. After a great length of time, someone asked, 'Well, how much does a brain cost?' The doctor quickly responded, 'Rs. 50,000 for a male brain, and Rs. 200 for a Female brain.'
The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to smile, avoiding eye contact with the women, but some actually smirked. A man unable to Control his curiosity, blurted out the question everyone wanted to ask, 'Why is the male brain so much more?'
The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and explained to the entire Group, 'It's just standard pricing procedure. We have to mark down the Price of the female brains, because they've actually been used, the male brains are hardly ever used by the owners. So they are as good as new'
SEND THIS TO A SMART WOMAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH AND TO THE MEN YOU THINK CAN HANDLE IT!!!!!!!!!!
Sun Jul 27, 2014 1:09 am (PDT) . Posted by:
Write a messa Hindi Jokes] Shyaris, Jokes, Qoutege...
Sun Jul 27, 2014 1:18 am (PDT) . Posted by:
Good one.
Kind regards
rezwan azad chowdhury
Sent from my BlackBerry 10 smartphone.
From: Mahesh Popat mahesh_popat@ymail.com [Hindi_Jokes]Sent:
Sunday, 20 July 2014 12:55 PMTo: Hindi_Jokes@yahoogroups.comReply
To: Mahesh PopatSubject: [Hindi Jokes] Story-GLASS OF MILK
(20.07.14)
CHAK DE
GLASS OF MILK
One day, a poor boy who was selling goods from door to door to
pay his way through school, found he had only one thin dime left,
and he was hungry.
He decided he would ask for a meal at the next house. However, he
lost his nerve when a lovely young woman opened the door.
Instead of a meal he asked for a drink of water! She thought he
looked hungry so brought him a large glass of milk. He drank it
so slowly, and then asked, How much do I owe you?"
You don't owe me anything," she replied. "Mother has taught us
never to accept pay for a kindness."
He said ... "Then I thank you from my heart."
As Howard Kelly left that house, he not only felt stronger
physically, but his faith in God and man was strong also. He had
been ready to give up and quit.
Many years later that same young woman became critically ill. The
local doctors were baffled. They finally sent her to the big
city, where they called in specialists to study her rare disease.
Dr. Howard Kelly was called in for the consultation. When he
heard the name of the town she came from, a strange light filled
his eyes.
Immediately he rose and went down the hall of the hospital to her
room.
Dressed in his doctor's gown he went in to see her. He recognized
her at once.
He went back to the consultation room determined to do his best
to save her life. From that day he gave special attention to her
case.
After a long struggle, the battle was won.
Dr. Kelly requested the business office to pass the final bill to
him for approval. He looked at it, and then wrote something on
the edge and the bill was sent to her room. She feared to open
it, for she was sure it would take the rest of her life to pay
for it all. Finally she looked, and something caught her
attention on the side of the bill. She read these words ...
"Paid in full with one glass of milk"
(Signed) Dr. Howard Kelly.
Tears of joy flooded her eyes as her happy heart prayed: "Thank
You, God, that your love has spread broad through human hearts
and hands."
There's a saying which goes something like this: Bread cast on
the waters comes back to you. The good deed you do today may
benefit you or someone you love at the least expected time. If
you never see the deed again at least you will have made the
world a better place - And, after all, isn't that what life is
all about?
Now you have two choices.
1. You can send this page on and spread a positive message.
2. Or ignore it and pretend it never touched your heart.
