Friday, April 30, 2010

[Hindi_Jokes] Digest Number 2601

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1.

WISE TIPS FROM TWEETY - ENJOY!!

Posted by: "SANWAL SADDIQUE" waseem7130@hotmail.com   mobilink7023

Thu Apr 29, 2010 6:55 am (PDT)

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2.

Awesome Flowers.

Posted by: "Amandeep singh" aman.girn@yahoo.co.in   aman.girn

Thu Apr 29, 2010 7:08 am (PDT)



pic Awesome Flowers.
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<http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Hindi_Jokes> Awesome Flowers.
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3.

SUHANI KE SUHANE JOKES-51-52-53-54-55-56-57-58-59-60

Posted by: "suhani" suhanisharma21f@gmail.com   suhanisharma21f

Thu Apr 29, 2010 9:00 am (PDT)



SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-051

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-051
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Bhikhari- "Das paise ka sawaal hai baabu, das paise ka|"
Baabu- "Wo to mai deta hoon, lekin pehle sawaal to poocho|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Shikshak- "Kya koi aadmi andhere me bhi dekh sakta hai?"
Ek Chatra- "Haan Sir, meri mummy dekh sakti hai|"
Shikshak- "Kaise?"
Chatra- "Kal raat cinema hall ke andhere me ve papa
se kah rahi thi ki tumhari dhaadi bahut badh gayi hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Aath saal ki bachi ne apni maa se poocha- "Mummy, Rani Elizabeth ko yah kaise pata chala ki unko bacha hone waala hai?"
Isse pehle ki maa koi jawaab deti, sabse choti bachi kah uthi- "Sabhi akhbaaro me chapa tha ki Rani ko bacha hone waala hai| Kya tum samajhti ho ki Rani akhbaar nahi padti hogi?"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Bachi ko jor-jor se roti dekhkar maa ne poocha- "kyo roti ho?"
Bachi- "Bhaiya ne meri gudiya tod di|"
Maa- "Kaise? Kaise tod di?"
Bachi- "Maine gudiya uske sir par maari thi?"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-052

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-052
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Ek Maa boli- "Galiyo me khel-khelkar bache
kitne gande ho jaate hai|"
Doosri Maa- "Haan, behanji| Ab dekho na,
das bacho ke muh dhone pade, tab kahi
jaakar mai apne guddu ko pehchaan payi|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Seeta- "Behan, bartan saaf karne ke liye sabse
achi kaun-si cheej hai?"
Geeta- "Maine bartan saaf karne ke liye bahut-si
cheeje istmaal ki, par pati se acha kisi ko nahi paya|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Pati- "Mai ghante-bhar se tumhe samjha raha hoon
aur tumhari samajh me baat nahi aa rahi hai|
Tumhare dimaag me to gobar bhara hua hai|"
Patni- "Aur aap use ghante-bhar se chaat rahe hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Master- "Rinku, kya kar rahe ho? Padh rahe ho kya?"
Rinku- "Ji nahi Shrimaan, mai apki baat sun raha hu|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-053

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-053
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Ek Sajjan ne ek saat varsheeya ladki se poocha-
"Tumhare baal vaakai bahut sundar hai| Ye tumhe
kisse mile hai, mummy se ya papa se?"
Ladki- "Jaha tak mera khyaal hai, mujhe ye baal mere
papa se mile hai, kyonki unke sir ke saare baal gaayab hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Patni- "Aap hi is company ki boss hai na?"
Boss ne hairani se poocha- "Are! Aapne kaise anumaan lagaya?"
Patni- "Bahut aasaan tha| Mere pati ghar me bacho ko hansane ke liye aapki hi harkato ki nakal kiya karte hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
School se lautne ke baad Santa ne maa ko bataya-
"Lagta hai, hamari Teacher kabhi nahi nahati|"
Maa- "Tumne aisa kaise samajha?"
Santa- "Vah kah rahi thi ki unhone aaj tak aisa koi
bhi kaam nahi kiya, jo sabke saamne nahi kar sakti|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Nanhi bachi- "Dadiji, kya aap acting bhi karti hai?"
Dadi- "Nahi to, lekin kyo?"
Bachi- "Subah maa pitaji se kah rahi thi ki yadi aap yaha rahi to drama to jaroor hoga|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-054

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-054
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Maa- "Itne dino se tum apne premi ke saath ghoom
rahi ho, vah shaadi ke liye kuch nahi bolta,
aakhir vah chahta kya hai?"
Beti- "Pata nahi maa, jyada samay vah mujhe
andhere me hi rakhta hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Bus Driver Ramu ko apni seat par baitha dekhkar
bola- "Are, utho shaitaan, meri seat par kyo baitha hai?"
Ramu- "Driver uncle, mai sabse pehle aaya tha|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Jigyasu bache ne poocha- "Mummy, aap papa ko kaha mili?"
Maa- "Ek picnic me|"
Bacha- "Kya mai aapke saath tha?"
Maa- 'Nahi, jab gayi thi to tum nahi the,
lekin jab mai lauti to tum saath aaye the|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Adhyapika- "Jo kaam tumne nahi kiya, uske liye
tumhe saja bhi nahi milegi|"
Rinki- "Dhanyavad Madam, aaj mai homework bhool gayi hoon|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-055

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-055
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Adhyapak- "Kya tum kisi badi ladai ke baare me jaante ho?
Ramesh- "Ji haan, lekin baat yah hai ki mummy ne ghar ki baate baahar batane se mana kiya hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Master- "Rakesh, suna hai, tumhare ghar me naya baby aaya hai?"
Rakesh- "Ji, naya kyo kehte hai aap? Jab rota hai
to aisa lagta hai ki barso se rona seekhta raha hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Maa- "Rinku, tum bure bacho ke saath kyo khelte ho,
ache bacho ke saath kyo nahi khelte?"
Rinku- "Maa, un ache bacho ki maatao ne apne
bacho ko mere saath khelne se mana kar diya hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Ek school me teen bhai padhte the| Inspector ne muaayne ke waqt sabse chote bhai se poocha- "Tumhare bhaiyo ke mooche nahi hai, par tumhare kyo hai, jabki tum sabse chote ho?"
Chote bhai ne jawaab diya- "Meri shakal Papa par hai aur un dono ki shakal Maa par|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-056

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-056
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Praathmik upchar ki pariksha chal rahi thi| Parikshak ne ek vidhyarthi se poocha- "Agar sadak par koi behosh pada aadmi dikh jaye, to aap kya karenge?"
Santa- "Mai use thodi-si brandy doonga|"
Parikshak- "Yadi us waqt aapke paas brandy na ho tab?"
Santa- "To brandy dene ka aashvasan doonga|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Ek Chote ladke ne apne adhyapak ko chunauti dete huye poocha- "Agar George Washington sachmuch ek imaandaar vyakti the, to unke janamdin par banko ko kyo band rakha jaata hai?"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Master- "Batao, gadhe aur manushya me kya fark hai?"
Vidhyarthi- "Manushya ko gadha kaha ja sakta hai,
parantu gadhe ko manushya nahi kaha ja sakta|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Adhyapak- "Bacho, mil-julkar kaam karna achi baat hai|"
Chaatra- "Lekin sir, pariksha me aap hi hame mil-julkar kaam nahi karne dete|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-057

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-057
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Santa- "Maine talaak dene ki or pehla kadam utha liya hai|"
Banta- "Vah kaise?"
Santa- "Maine shaadi kar li hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Train me saamne ki seat par baithe pati chew gum chaba rahe the| Kaafi der baad saamne ki seat par baithi unki patni boli- "Darling, I am sorry, tum itni der se mujhse bole ja rahe ho, par mai jawaab nahi de rahi hoon| Mere beherepan me yahi to musibat hai, jara jor-jor se bole|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Pati- "Abhi Reena ki shaadi ki jaldi hi kya hai?
Bahut samay pada hai| Jab tak koi acha ladka na mil jaye, tab tak hame pratiksha karni chahiye|"
Patni- "Pratiksha bhi kab tak ki ja sakti hai, jab mai
Reena ki umra ki thi, tab mere ghar waalo ne hi acha
ladka talaash karne ki koshish kaha ki thi|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Maa- "Beta, tumhaara office ka kaam kaisa chal raha hai| Sab thik to hai na?"
Beta- "Mere neeche pachees aadmi kaam karte hai maa|"
Maa khushi se- "To kya mera beta vaha bada
Officer ban gaya hai?"
Beta- "Nahi! Darahsal mai Upri manjil me kaam karta hoon|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-058

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-058
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Ek nai-nai dulhan ne apne pati se poocha- "Yadi mai kabhi moti ho jau to kya tab bhi tum mujhe chahte rahoge?"
Pati- "Kabhi nahi| Maine kewal ache-bure dino me saath dene ka vachan diya hai| Mote-patle ki koi baat nahi hui thi|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Putra- "Papa! Sadak banane me kin-kin cheejo ki jarurat hoti hai?"
Pita- "Aaj to sawaal pooch-poochkar tune tang hi kar dala, yadi itne hi sawaal maine apne papa se kiye hote to kya hota batao?"
Putra- "Aapko mere sawaalo ke jawaab dene aa jaate|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Santa- "Ab mai kisi ladki ke saamne shaadi ki
baat nahi rakhunga|"
Banta- "Kyo... Kya phir kisi ne mana kar diya?"
Santa- "Nahi yaar, ek ladki ne sweekar kar liya hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Office me patni ki chithi aayi| Apne maayke se bheji thi| Pati ka mitra patra me jhaankne laga to pati ne liphapha uske saamne daal diya- "Lo, padh lo|"
Mitra ne dekha to chaukkar bola- "Isme to saada kaagaj hai yaar|"
Pati- "Haan| Aajkal hamaari bolchaal band hai|
Vah jhagda karke ghar se gayi hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-059

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-059
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Premi- "Chalo, cinema chalte hai| Pichli seat
ka ticket le lenge|"
Premika- "Agar pichli seat ka ticket na mila to?"
Premi- "To phir film hi dekh lenge|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Patni pyaar se- "Khaana ban gaya hai| Garm-garm
phulke khakar jaaiye|"
Pati- "Burnol (antiseptic cream) hai ghar me?"
Patni- "Haan|"
Pati- "Phir to kha lunga|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Ek vidhwa ne apne swargiya pati ki kabra par lage pathar par likhvaya- "Yaha aaraam karta hai vah pati,
jo apni patni ke liye paanch laakh rupye chod gaya aur jisne shehar ke saare patiyo ke liye ek misaal chodi|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Santa- "Jis din meri patni aayi usi din mera
khajaanchi mere kuch rupaye lekar bhaag gaya|"
Banta- "Tum nahi jaante ki musibat kabhi
akele nahi aati|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-060

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-060
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Ek khoobsurat stree jaasusi upanyaas padte-padte
apne pati se poochne lagi- "yadi koi khoobsurat
ladka mujhe bhagakar le jaye to tum kya karoge?"
Pati- "Mai usse kahunga, khuda ke bande, bhagakar
le jaane ki kya jarurat hai, aaram se le jao|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Ek pustak ke pehle panne par likha hai- "Mohabbat ke maare ko aatmahatya se rokne ka sabse aasaan upaay hai, shaadi|"
Aur usi pustak ke sabse aakhiri panne par likha hai- "shaadi se bachne ka bas ek hi upaay hai aur vah hai aatmahatya|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Maa- "Beta, koyle nahi hai, roti kaise banegi?"
Beta- "Chaaval bana lena, maa|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Seeta- "Hamaare ghar me saara saamaan imported
yaani videshi hai|"
Geeta- "Aur aapke pati...?"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
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suhanisharma21f@gmail.com
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4.

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 381-382-383-384-385-386-387-388-389-390

Posted by: "neha s" nehashah20f@yahoo.com   nehashah20f

Thu Apr 29, 2010 9:01 am (PDT)




NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 381

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 381
*****************************
Agar main gulaab tumhe du,
To kya tum bhi mujhe gulaab doge,
Main jaanta tha mera katal tum karoge nahi,
Tadpaaoge magar jinda bhi tum mujhe rehne na doge.
*****************************
Agar dena hi tha to pyaar me dhokha dete jaalim,
Shaadi karke to ham yu hi tabaah ho gaye.
*****************************
Sitam ko hamne berookhi samajha,
Pyaar ko hamne bundgi samajha,
Tum chaahe hame jo bhi samajho,
Hamne to tumhe apni jindagi samajha.
*****************************
Chaand se haseen hai chaandni,
Chaandni se haseen hai raat,
Raat se haseen jindagi aur
Wo jindagi hai aap.
*****************************
Mohabbat ka paigaam kehte hai gulaab ko,
Sabse pehle ham salaam kehate hai aapko,
Sharaab ko kharab mat kehna sanam,
Becheni me aaraam kehte hai sharaab ko.
*****************************
NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 382

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 382
*****************************
Jaha gaye the khushiyo ke taraane,
Mukkadar dekhiye roye wahi par,
Huye mandir se gaayab joote hamaare,
Jaha se paaye the, khoye wahi par.
*****************************
Mushkile dilo ke iraade aajmayenge,
Khwaab ke parde nigaaho se hatayenge,
Girkar hausla mat haarna,
Ye thokare hi tujhko chalna sikhayenge.
*****************************
Dil ka dard kisi ko dikha na sake,
Jo dil me tha wo kisi ko bata na sake,
Kiye the jawaani me ladkiyo par jo kharche,
Unke bill budaape tak chuka na sake.
*****************************
Khushboo jo phoolo me samaai huyi hai,
Ae dil uski saanso se churaayi huyi hai.
*****************************
Chaand taaro se bhari raat bhali lagti hai,
Phool patto ki mulakaat bhali lagti hai,
Jo baat hotho par na aa paaye kabhi,
Wo baat SMS se karni bhali lagti hai.
*****************************
NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 383

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 383
*****************************
Paise se gaadi khareedi ja sakti hai,
Magar samay nahi,
Insaan kharida ja sakta hai magar pyaar nahi,
Isaliye aap apna sara paisa mujhe de do.
*****************************
Teri dosti ne bahut kuch sikha diya,
Meri khaamosh duniya ko jaise hasa diya,
Karjdaar hu main khuda ka jisane,
Mujhe tere jaise dost se mila diya.
*****************************
Dost hi dost ka saath diya karte hai,
Dost hi dost ko gam diya karte hai,
Jindagi me kuch pal aise bhi aate hai,
Jab dost hi dost ko badnaam kiya karte hai.
*****************************
Yu hi to khoobsurat hai dosti ka nata,
Jo bina shart ke jiya jata hai,
Rahe dooriya to parawaah nahi,
Dost to har pal dil me basaya jaata hai.
*****************************
Dhokha mila jab pyaar me,
Jindagi me udaasi chha gai,
Socha tha ki chod denge is raah ko,
Par aaj mohale me doosri aa gai.
*****************************
NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 384

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 384
*****************************
Tum bhula nahi sakoge kabhi mere pyaar ko,
Mere chumbano ko aur mere hotho ki pukaar ko,
Meri ungaliyo ne jo gazal tumhaare badan par likhi thi,
Tum mere deedaar ko.
*****************************
Daali se patte yu hi gira nahi karte,
Bichad ke log jyaada jiya nahi karte,
Kuch naye SMS ho to bhejiye,
Warna purane SMS baar-baar ham pada nahi karte.
*****************************
Thokar na maarna mujhe bekaar samajh kar,
Seene se laga dena mujhe haar samajhakar,
Raahi ko samajhane me kahi bhool na karna,
Hamne tumhe chaha hai samajhdaar samajhakar.
*****************************
Pal pal se banta hai ehasaas,
Ehasaas se banta hai wishwaas,
Wishwaas se bante hai rishte,
Aur rishte se banta hai koi aap jaisa khaas.
*****************************
Jaise taaro ke saath aakaash hai,
Waise hi sacchi dosti ke saath wishwaas hai,
Dil ki najro se dekhoge agar,
Ham har waqt aapke paas hai.
*****************************
NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 385

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 385
*****************************
Hamaari tabaahi me aapka haath hai,
Par hamaari sharaafat dekho ham,
Sabse kehate hai ki ye to kismat ki baat hai.
*****************************
Dil jalo ke dil par khanjar chalane chod do,
Gir padegi bijaliya tum muskurana chod do.
*****************************
Gulaab hai gulaabi, teri aankhe hai sharaabi,
Tere labo par sawaal hai, meri aankhe hai jawaabi,
Likhne me kya harz hai, padne me kya hai kharabi,
Padne wala ho agar yaaro ka yaar,
To mera chehra hai kitaabi.
*****************************
Gamo ka jehar pee rahe hai,
Chand geeto ke sahaare jee rahe hai,
Phoonk apna ghar isaliye diya taaki,
Kuch gharo me roshani hoti rahe.
*****************************
Dil ke sab raaj de raha hu main,
Kuch naya saaj de raha hu main,
SMS to bahana hai,
Tumko aawaaj de raha hu main.
*****************************
NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 386

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 386
*****************************
Kitni parwaah ham karte hai unki,
Kaash unhe bhi ye ehasaas ho jaaye,
Kahi aisa na ho ki wo hosh me aaye,
Aur ham gehari neend me so jaaye.
*****************************
Gulaab ka bagicha hai, magar phool nahi hai,
Aapki bewafaai hame, kubool nahi hai,
Aapne to shaayad mujhko bhula dala,
Magar dosto ko bhula dena mera usool nahi hai.
*****************************
Phoolo ko phool pasand hai,
Dilo ko dil pasand hai,
Shaayro ko shaayri pasand hai,
Kisi ki pasand se hame kya,
Hamko to aapka saath pasand hai.
*****************************
Saagar ka hai paani aur nadiya ki hai dhara,
Bata kis kaaran se tune toda hai dil hamara,
Aaj to wo bhi paas se hokar gujar jaate hai,
Kal tak lagta tha jinko main jaan se bhi pyara.
*****************************
Mujhko naya jamana hairat me daalta hai,
Jiska bhi gala dabaao,
Wo hi aankhen nikaalta hai.
*****************************
NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 387

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 387
*****************************
Dil mera tera bimar aaj bhi hai,
Teree kasam tumse mujhe pyaar aaj bhi hai,
Mana ki tujhe kaid kar diya bedard logo ne,
In pehro ke baawjood tera intjaar aaj bhi hai.
*****************************
Ham hawa ke jhonke hai gujar jaayenge,
Khamoshi se tumhaare dil me utar jaayenge,
Paakar tumhaari dosti ye hua ehasaas,
Tumse bichad kar ham mar jaayenge.
*****************************
Ae dost mujh par itna ehasaan kar de,
Apni dosti mere naam kar de,
Na rahe kisi aur ki jagah is dil me,
Dost hone ki wajah mere dil me bhar de.
*****************************
Khushboo pyaar ki taraf bikhar jaati hai,
Tumhaare muskuraane se hamaari duniya bhi muskurati hai,
Jab bhi dekhte hai SMS tumhara ham apne mobile par,
Khuda kasam saare jamaane ki khushiya hamaare paas chali aati hai.
*****************************
Najar se najar churaoge kab tak,
Dost se dosti chupaaoge kab tak,
Hamaare SMS tumhe lagataar milte rahenge,
In dosti ki nishaniyo ko mitaaoge kab tak.
*****************************
NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 388

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 388
*****************************
Janaza mera nikla,
Duniya dekhane nikli,
Magar wo jaalim nahi nikli,
Jiske kaaran mera janaza nikla.
*****************************
Paani me patthar mat pheko,
Use koi aur bhi pita hai,
Jeena hai to haskar jiyo kyonki,
Tumhe dekhakar koi aur bhi jita hai.
*****************************
Kisi ko mohabbat ki achai ne maar dala,
Kisi ko mohabbat ki gehraai ne maar dala,
Bach na saka is mohabbat se koi,
Jo bach gaya use tanhaai ne maar dala.
*****************************
Phool me khushboo nahi, panghat me paani nahi,
Main to deewana hu tera, tu meri deewaani nahi,
Mere gam ki kahani sunkar, sabhi ne yahi kaha,
Jhoothi hai ye kahaani, teri kahaani sacchi nahi.
*****************************
Jindagi mei to tumhaari ham aa naa sake isaliye
Tumhaare khwabo me chale aate hai,
Tum laakh najare fer lo sanam,
Ham phir bhi chale aate hai.
*****************************
NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 389

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 389
*****************************
Meethe dard ka asar hai sahkar to dekho,
Pyaar katra nahi samundar hai, behkar to dekho,
Tumhaare liye chod denge jamana,
Ek baar dost kehkar to dekho.
*****************************
Koi dikha ke roye, koi chupa ke roye,
Hame roolane waale hame roola ke roye,
Marne ka maja to tab hai,
Jab kaatil bhi janaaze par aa kar roye.
*****************************
Pyaar karte ho hamse,
Ye najar aapki batati hai,
Ham aapke pyaar me rote hai,
Neend aapko bhi kahan aati hai.
*****************************
Manjil ki taraf badte chalo,
Jo dil kahe usi raah ko chuno,
Piche waalo ko aage na jaane do,
Aur jo aage hai unse aage nikalo,
Tabhi aap ek ache truck driver ban sakte ho.
*****************************
Agar tu ek din ke liye khush hona chaahte ho,
To 'Date' par chale jao, agar kuch din ke liye khush hona chahte ho,
To kisi se pyaar kar lo, aur agar hamesha ke liye khush rehna chahte ho,
To hamse yu hi rishta banaaye rakhna.
*****************************
NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 390

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 390
*****************************
Parakhna mat parakhne me koi apna nahi rehta,
Kisi bhi aaine me der tak cehra nahi rehta,
Mohabbat ek khushboo hai hamesha saath chalti hai,
Koi insaan tanhaai me bhi tanha nahi rehta.
*****************************
Koshish bahut ki dil ko samajhne ki,
Aankhon ko kasam di so jaane ki,
Bahut samjhaya phir bhi aankhen nahi soyi,
Soyi to jab maine baat ki aapke khwaab me aane ki.
*****************************
Wo kaun hai jinke intajaar me raaho par tikti hai najar,
Wo kaun hai jisne mujhase mujhko kiya hai bekhabar,
Wo kaun hai jo ban jaayegi meri chaahat-e-jigar,
Wo kaun hai jo banegi meri umra bhar ki hamsafar.
*****************************
Jisne dil diya, wo Delhi chali gayi,
Jisne pyaar kiya, wo Italy chali gayi,
Dil ne kaha khudkhushi kar le jaalim,
Bijli ko haath lagaya, to kambakht bijli chali gayi.
*****************************
Kya aankhen hai kya julfe hai kya soorat paayi hai,
Aisa lagta hai jaise peepal ke
Ped se koi bhootni utar aayi hai.
*****************************

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Hindi_Jokes

Friends now my sms are also available at
http://hindijokes.informe.com
Please send your comments here.

Neha Shah
Add me as your friend at face book
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Thursday, April 29, 2010

[Hindi_Jokes] Digest Number 2600

Messages In This Digest (8 Messages)

Messages

1.

(Touching) - Please Dont Drink & Drive

Posted by: "Pankaj Sharma" pankaj.pkj6@gmail.com

Wed Apr 28, 2010 8:53 am (PDT)



I went to a party Mom,
I remembered what you said.
You told me not to drink, Mom,
So I drank soda instead.

I really felt proud inside, Mom,
The way you said I would.
I didn't drink and drive, Mom,
Even though the others said I should.

I know I did the right thing, Mom,
I know you are always right.
Now the party is finally ending, Mom,
As everyone is driving out of sight.

As I got into my car, Mom,
I knew I'd get home in one piece.
Because of the way you raised me,
So responsible and sweet.

I started to drive away, Mom,
But as I pulled out into the road,
The other car didn't see me, Mom,
And hit me like a load.

As I lay there on the pavement, Mom,
I hear the policeman say,
"The other guy is drunk," Mom,
And now I'm the one who will pay.

I'm lying here dying, Mom....
I wish you'd get here soon.
How could this happen to me, Mom?
My life just burst like a balloon.

There is blood all around me, Mom,
And most of it is mine.
I hear the medic say, Mom,
I'll die in a short time..

I just wanted to tell you, Mom,
I swear I didn't drink.
It was the others, Mom.
The others didn't think.

He was probably at the same party as I.
The only difference is, he drank
And I will die.

Why do people drink, Mom?
It can ruin your whole life.
I'm feeling sharp pains now.
Pains just like a knife.

The guy who hit me is walking, Mom,
And I don't think it's fair.
I'm lying here dying
And all he can do is stare.

Tell my brother not to cry, Mom.
Tell Daddy to be brave.
And when I go to heaven, Mom,
Put "GOOD BOY " on my grave.

Someone should have told him, Mom,
Not to drink and drive.
If only they had told him, Mom,
I would still be alive.

My breath is getting shorter, Mom.
I'm becoming very scared.
Please don't cry for me, Mom.
When I needed you, you were always there.

I have one last question, Mom.
Before I say good bye.
I didn't drink and drive,
So why am I the one to die?

Someone took the effort to write this poem. So please, forward this
To as many people as you can. And see if we can get a chain going
Around the world that will make people understand that
Don't mix drinking and driving.

PLEASE DO THE FAVOR.

67

Keep Smiling

PANKAJ SHARMA
pankaj.pkj1@gmail.com
"You are not responsible for what people think about you.
But you are responsible for what you give them to think about you"
<http://www.incredimail.com/?id=606431&rui=126747468>

--
67

Keep Smiling

PANKAJ SHARMA
pankaj.pkj1@gmail.com
"You are not responsible for what people think about you.
But you are responsible for what you give them to think about you"
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2.

(Informative) Containes all 26 alphabets in english.

Posted by: "Pankaj Sharma" pankaj.pkj6@gmail.com

Wed Apr 28, 2010 8:57 am (PDT)



I KNOW YOU ALREADY KNOW ABOUT THE SAME, BUT I SEND THIS FOR REFRESH YOUR
MEMORY :)

" A BROWN FOX JUMPED QUICKLY
OVER THE LAZY DOGS"

what is the special for this sentence.,

Containes all 26 alphabets in english.

--
Keep Smiling

PANKAJ SHARMA
pankaj.pkj1@gmail.com
"You are not responsible for what people think about you.
But you are responsible for what you give them to think about you"
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3.

(Nice) Axe Story New Version

Posted by: "Pankaj Sharma" pankaj.pkj6@gmail.com

Wed Apr 28, 2010 9:03 am (PDT)



If a female is reading this article then just realize the value of a
man; and if its a male then feel proud of after reading it!

"One day, while a woodcutter was cutting a branch of a tree above a
river, his axe fell into the river. When he cried out, the Lord appeared
and asked, "Why are you crying?"

The woodcutter replied that his axe has fallen into water, and he needed
the axe to make his living.

The Lord went down into the water and reappeared with a golden axe. "Is
this your axe?" the Lord asked.

The woodcutter replied, "No."

The Lord again went down and came up with a silver Axe. "Is this your
axe?" the Lord asked.

Again, the woodcutter replied, "No."

The Lord went down again and came up with an iron Axe.
"Is this your
axe?" the Lord asked.

The woodcutter replied, "Yes."
The Lord was pleased with the man's honesty and gave him all three axes
to keep, and the woodcutter went home happy.

Some time later the woodcutter was walking with his wife along the
riverbank, and his wife fell into the river. When he cried out, the Lord
again appeared and asked him, "Why are you crying?"

"Oh Lord, my wife has fallen into the water!"

The Lord went down into the water and came up with
ANGELINA JOLIE "Is
this your wife?" the Lord asked.

"Yes," cried the woodcutter.

The Lord was furious. "You lied! That is an untruth!"

The woodcutter replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is a
misunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'no' to ANGELINA JOLIE , You
would have come up with CAMERON DIAZ . Then if I said 'no' to her, you
would have come up with my wife. Had I then said 'yes,' you would have
given me all three. Lord, I am a poor man, and am not able to take care
of all three wives, so THAT'S why I said yes to ANGELINA JOLIE ."

The moral of this story is: Whenever a man lies, it is for a good and
honorable reason, and for the benefit of others.

That's our story, and we're sticking to it! - "WE HONORABLE MEN!!!

--
67

Keep Smiling

PANKAJ SHARMA
pankaj.pkj1@gmail.com
"You are not responsible for what people think about you.
But you are responsible for what you give them to think about you"
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4.

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 371-372-373-374-375-376-377-378-379-380

Posted by: "neha s" nehashah20f@yahoo.com   nehashah20f

Wed Apr 28, 2010 9:16 am (PDT)




NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 371

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 371
*****************************
Pahli mulakaat me kuch aisa hua ehasaas,
Ki ham bayaan bhi na kar paaye,
Aakhir mulakaat me kuch to kahna hi tha unase,
Yahi sochate huye unhe tanha chod aaye.
*****************************
Khaali saanse bhi nishaan rakhti hai,
Toote huye dil bhi aramaan rakhte hai,
Jo khamoshi se gujar jaaye wo dariya bhi
Dil me toofan rakhte hai.
*****************************
Kaash banaane waale na hame aansu banaya hota,
Aur usaki aankh me basaya hota,
Jab girate unaki aankh se unki god me,
To hame marane ka maja bhi aaya hota.
*****************************
Pyaar ka rishta to toda toone,
Ab jo rishta hai wo tod na jana,
Denge saath har mod pe tujhako,
Beech raaste pe hamko kabhi chod na jana.
*****************************
Aaj kuch kami hai tere bagair,
Na rang hai na roshani hai tere bagair,
Waqt apni raftaar se chal raha hai,
Bas dhadkan thamni hai tere bagair.
*****************************
NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 372

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 372
*****************************
Duniya me koi kisi ke liye kuch nahi karta,
Marne waale ke saath har koi nahi marta,
Are marne ki baat to chodo,
Yaha jindagi hai phir bhi koi yaad nahi karta.
*****************************
Na jaane ye najre kyon udaas rahti hai,
Na jaane ise kiski talaash rahti hai?
Ye jaankar bhi ki wo kismat me nahi hai,
Phir bhi unhe paane ki aas rahti hai.
*****************************
Fareb tha ya hasi, main aashiki samajh baitha,
Maut ko hi apni jindagi samajh baitha,
Waqt ka majaak tha yaa badnaseeb meri,
Unki do baato ko main chaahat samajh baitha.
*****************************
Yaado ki keemat wo kya jaane jo,
Khud hi yaado ko mita diya karte hai.
Yaado ka matlab to unse poocho jo,
Yaado ke sahaare jiya karte hai.
*****************************
Na wo aa sake na ham jaa sake,
Darde dil kisi ko na suna sake,
Yaado ko lekar bahte hai aansu me unki,
Na wo bhula sake na ham bhula sake.
*****************************
NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 373

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 373
*****************************
Dil ne kaha yaad karna chod do,
Dil ne kaha yaad karna chod do...
Tum to hamaare saanso me base ho to,
Kya saans lena chod du...?
*****************************
Dil ke kareeb aakar wo jab door ho gaye,
Saare haseen khwaab choor-choor ho gaye,
Hamne wafa nibhaaI to sirf badnaami mili,
Par wo bewafaai karke mashhoor ho gaye.
*****************************
Jindagi gamo ka pulinda hai,
Khushiya aaj kal chunnida hai,
Kabhi yaad kar liya karo is naacheej ko yaar,
Yah shakhs abhi tak jinda hai.
*****************************
Kuch pal hote hai, kuch pal ke liye,
Jee le inhe ham har pal ke liye,
Ye waqt to ret ki tarah fisal jaayega,
De jaayenge yaade umra bhar ke liye...
*****************************
Apni bebsi par aaj rona aaya,
Doosro ne kya, mujhe apno ne aajmaya,
Hamne har dost ki tanhaai door ki lekin,
Khud ko har mod par akela paya.
*****************************
NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 374

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 374
*****************************
Yaado me hamaari wo kabhi khoye honge,
Khuli aankhon se wo kabhi soye honge,
Mana haseen hai ek ada gam chupaane ki,
Par haste-haste wo bhi kabhi roye honge.
*****************************
Kudrat ke karishmo me agar raat na hoti,
Khwaabo me bhi unse mulakaat na hoti,
Ye dil to hai har gam ki wajah,
Ye dil hi na hota to koi baat na hoti.
*****************************
Dil aapko dene ka faisla kar chuke hai ham,
Ab aapki marjee hai ki rakho ya chod do,
Ham to chaahte hai is dil ko jodna aapse,
Ab aapki marjee hai dil jode ya tod de.
*****************************
Agar aap barsaat ka maja chaaho,
To in aankhon me aakar baso,
Kyonki barsaat to barso me barasti hai aur
Ye aankhen to barso se barasti hai.
*****************************
Har rishta mila viraasat me,
Phir dosti alag se kyon banaai hai,
Kyonki baaki rishte banaaye the khuda ne,
Aur dosti khud khuda ki parchaai hai.
*****************************
NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 375

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 375
*****************************
Har mulakaat unse adhoori si rahi,
Har khushi me kuch kami si rahi,
Khwaab kya dekhe ham ne tumhare,
Neend ki aankhon se dushmani si rahi.
*****************************
Dooriyo se fark padta nahi,
Baat to dilo kee jubaan se hoti hai,
Bhaai chara to khaas kuch aap jaiso se hai,
Warna mulakaat to kitno se hoti hai.
*****************************
Ye pyari nigaahe yaad rahengi,
Milkar na milne ki ada yaad rahengi,
Mumkin nahi ki me tumhe bhula du,
Par tumhe bhi umra bhar meri yaad rahegi.
*****************************
Chaand-taare chhup gaye, beet gaye hai raat,
Dhoop sunhari dekhakar jaag gaya sansaar,
Din gujare acha, karte dua hajaar,
Bhej rahe hai ham aapko subah ka namaskar.
*****************************
Yun to ham bhi madad kiya nahi karte,
Kisi se bhi aise hi mulakaat kiya nahi karte,
Ye to aapse hai dil ka rishta,
Warna SMS to kya, ham kisi ko apna,
Mobile number bhi diya nahi karte.
*****************************
NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 376

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 376
*****************************
Saath deta jo samay to aap hamaare hote,
Ham bhi auro ki tarah aapke pyare hote,
Ye mere aansu jinhe poochne wala bhi nahi koi,
Aanchal inhe milta to ye bhi sitaare hote.
*****************************
Aaj phir khuda ne poocha,
Tera hasta hua chehra udaas kyon hai?
Barasti nigaaho me udaasi kyon hai?
Jinaki najaro me tu kuch bhi nahi,
Wo tere liye itna khaas kyon hai...?
*****************************
Din-raat aahe bharte hai yaad me,
Par mohabbat ka ijahaar kyon nahi karte?
Najar se najar takraati hai har baar,
Chaah kar bhi aankhen chaar kyon nahi karte?
Poocho hamse bhi hamaare dil ki halaat,
Aankhon me chupe pyar ka aitbaar kyon nahi karte?
*****************************
Mujhe teri wafao par aitabaar bahut hai,
Teri kasam tujhase mujhe pyaar bahut hai.
*****************************
Aapko kya lagta hai ki ham aapse flirt karte hai,
Ruko, sambhalo, abhi ke abhi aapko alert karte hai,
Are, ye to mahaul aur mausam ka asar hai,
Warna yun hi ham bhi time waste kiya nahi karte.
*****************************
NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 377

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 377
*****************************
Aap kutte, gadhe, suar, lomdi,
Kauwe aur kabootar jaise hai,
Mera matlab aap wafadaar,
Mehnati, chalaak, smart aur shant hai.
*****************************
Bhool kar hamne kabhi khopdi mundwaai nahi,
Par na smajhe ki aapki society me koi nal nahi,
Kaam chal jaaye jab haseeno ki jootiyo se,
To kya shikaayat hai ki naI se banwaayi nahi.
*****************************
Palko ki is luka-chupi ko
Dil kehta hai ki main pyaar maan lu,
Na keh kar tum hans dete ho,
Kaise me inkaar maan lu.
*****************************
Jab bhi jikra hoga mera tere saamne kabhi,
To tanhaai me jaakar tum aansu bahaya karoge bahut,
Meri jindagi ko rota tadapta chodkar,
Tum apni bewafaai par pachtaya karoge bahut.
*****************************
Naajneen husn malaika, nakhra-e-saaz ho tum,
Dilkash mohabbat ka haseen andaaj ho tum,
Kyon raaj se raaj ka raaj ho tum,
Taj nahi mere dil ki mumtaj ho tum.
*****************************
NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 378

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 378
*****************************
Aap rootha na karo hamse,
Mere dil ki dhadkan bad jaati hai,
Dil to aapke naam kar chuke hai,
Jaan bas baaki hai,
Wo bhi nikal jaati hai.
*****************************
Khushiyo ke din dhal gaye,
Mujhe gam ki raato ne ghera hai,
Intajaar hardam jaane kab hoga sawera,
Ummeed ki thi jinse dil ko dilasa dene ki,
Aaj unhone hi dekho dil toda hai.
*****************************
Wo mithaai hi kya, jisme shakar na ho,
Wo gaadi hi kya, jisme koi takkar na ho,
Aur wo jindagi hi kya,
Jisme koi chakar na ho.
*****************************
Shabnam se kya phool khile,
Jab tak ki barsaat na ho,
SMS se kya dil bhare jab tak,
Ki baat na ho.
*****************************
2 hi pal office me gujarte hai khush-haal,
Ek boss ke aane se pehle aur
Ek boss ke jaane ke baad.
*****************************
NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 379

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 379
*****************************
Log bedard hai yaha, jaalim saara jamana hai,
Dushman huye apne paraye, saya tak begana hai,
Kis par ab yakeen kare ham,
Ae sanam is shehar par har shaks pyaar se anjana hai.
*****************************
Galat najar se dekhoge to har jagah kharabi milegi,
Aur sahi najar se dekhoge to har sundar ladki tumhe,
Apni bhaabhi lagegi,
Sada khush raho, tumhara bada bhaaI.
*****************************
Mar gaye kitne yaha par pyaas se,
Boond saagar me baras kar reh gai,
Ham sochte hai aayega tera SMS,
Par phir ye nigaahe taras kar reh gai.
*****************************
Jawaani ke din chamkile ho gaye,
Husn ke tewar nukile ho gaye,
Ham ijahaar karne me kya dheele ho gaye,
Ki unke haath peele ho gaye.
*****************************
Sochoge jab bhi tum chaahne waalo ki tarah,
Yaad aa jaayenge ham toote huye pyalo ki tarah,
Jab bhi tanhaai me andhero se dar jaaoge tum,
Meri yaade kamre me fel jaayengi ujaalo ki tarah...
*****************************
NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 380

NEHA KE NYARE NYARE SMS - 380
*****************************
Itane din se jalane nahi aaya,
Galti huyi aag ko bujhaane nahi aaya,
Kehta tha saath jiyenge aur saath marenge,
Ab rooth gaye hai ham, magar abhi wo manane nahi aaya.
*****************************
Akal underwear ki tarah hoti hai,
Jo honi sab ke paas chaahiye,
Par jaroori nahi ki sabko,
Dikhaayi jaaye.
*****************************
Maut maangta hu to jindagi khafa ho jaati hai,
Jehar lete hai to wo bhi dawa ho jaati hai,
Tu hi bata ae mere dost me kya karu,
Jisko bhi chaahte hai wo bewafa ho jaati hai.
*****************************
Khali purse haath me usko thama deta hu me,
Yu hatheli par kabhi sarso jama deta hu me,
Jab kabhi begam ka para had se jyada chad jaaye,
To sabse pehle jootiya uski chupa deta hu me.
*****************************
Gulaab ko bhi kamal bana dete,
Uski ek ada kaI gajal bana dete,
Kambakht marti nahi mujh par ladkiya,
Warna ham bhi ek Taj mahal bana dete.
*****************************
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Hindi_Jokes

Friends now my sms are also available at
http://hindijokes.informe.com
Please send your comments here.

Neha Shah
Add me as your friend at face book
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Messages in this topic (1)
5.

Beware

Posted by: "TABASSUM KADRI" kadritabassum@yahoo.com   kadritabassum

Wed Apr 28, 2010 9:20 am (PDT)




--- On Tue, 4/27/10, iqbal.k <iqbal.k@panasonicenergy.in> wrote:

From: iqbal.k <iqbal.k@panasonicenergy.in>
Subject: Fw: Beware
To: "tabassum kadri" <kadritabassum@yahoo.com>
Date: Tuesday, April 27, 2010, 8:52 AM

€ ¦ 
Thanks€ ¦  &€ ¦  Regards
€ ¦ 
€ ¦ Iqbal€ ¦  Kadri
€ ¦ Marketing
Department
€ ¦ Panasonic Energy India Co.Ltd
€ ¦ GIDC-€ ¦  Makarpura
Road
€ ¦ Vadodara- 390010
----- Original Message -----
From: Mangala
To: Pritha Mukherjee ; Aparna Trivedi ; Asmita Parmar ; Iqbal
- Mktg ; Daxa
Sent: Tuesday, April 27, 2010 8:32 AM
Subject: Fw: Beware

€ ¦ 
----- Original Message -----
From: Hemant
Chavan
To: chavan.mangala
Sent: Monday, April 26, 2010 8:00 PM
Subject: Beware

€ ¦ 

Dear All,

Mumbai police are
facing a strange case of rape in which the victim has not even seen the
criminal. There is a new way to rape women. The victim left the office after
work and saw a little child crying on the road. Feeling pity for the child, she
went and asked what happened. The child said, I am lost. Can you take me home
please?' Then the child gave her a slip and told the girl where the address is.

The girl, being an average kind person, didn't suspect anything and took the
child there. And there when she arrived to the 'child's home', she pressed the
door bell, she received a shock as the bell was wired with high voltage current,
and she fainted.
The next
day when she woke up, she found herself in an
empty house up in the hills, with nothing on.. She didn't even get to see the
face of the attacker...
Nowadays crimes are targeted on kind people. Next
time if the same situation occurs, never bring the child to the intended place.
If the child insists, then take the child to the police station.
Lost
children are best sent to the police stations. Please send this to all your
female friends. Guys forward it to all the women you care about

- Mumbai
Police -

--
" Monitor alone uses more than half of computer's total
power. I choose to switch off the monitor every time I take a
break."

Please consider your environmental responsibility before
Printing.

Save paper, save water
Say no to
Plastic

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6.

SUHANI KE SUHANE JOKES-41-42-43-44-45-46-47-48-49-50

Posted by: "suhani" suhanisharma21f@gmail.com   suhanisharma21f

Wed Apr 28, 2010 9:21 am (PDT)



SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-041

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-041
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Baap- "Andhera hone se pehle ghar aa jaana|"
Beti- "Lekin papa, ab mai bachi nahi hu|"
Baap- "Mujhe maaloom hai| isliye mai tumhe keh
raha hu ki andhera hone se pehle ghar aa jaana|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Santa- "Kuwara hone se jyaada buri baat
kya ho sakti hai?"
Banta- "Kuware ka ladka hona|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Santa- "Meri patni bahut jhooth bolti hai| kal teen
ghante ghar se gaayab rahi| vapsi par mujhe bataya ki
vah apni saheli geeta ke saath film dekhne gayi thi|"
Banta- "Magar tumhe kaise pata chala ki vah
jhooth bol rahi thi?"
Santa- "Us samay geeta ke saath mai film dekh raha tha|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Premi- "Mai tumse pyaar karta hu salma|"
Premika- "Meri ammi is pyaar-mohabbat ko thik
nahi samajhti|"
Premi- "Are gajab khuda ka... mai tumhari ammi
se pyaar nahi karta|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-042

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-042
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Ek paadri ne ek sunder yuvti se kaha- "Raat mai
poore teen ghante tak tumhaare liye dua karta raha|"
Yuvti- "Aapne bekaar itna kasht uthaaya| Agar
aap dua ki jagah mujhe phone bhi kar dete to mai
paanch minute me aapke paas pahunch jaati|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Ramesh- "Aajkal to har cheej ki kifaayat ho rahi hai|"
Dinesh- "Yaar, vah kaise?"
Ramesh- "Hamaare pados me ek dropadi aunty rehti
hai, magar unka ek hi pati hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Kabaadi- "Bahanji, puraana ya raddi maal hai kya?"
Gruhni- "Ve baahar gaye hai| Lautkar aaye tab aana|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Seeta- "Aaj mere pati ka janamdin hai, samajh me
nahi aa raha hai ki unhe kya uphaar du?"
Geeta- "Uphaar apni pasand ka dena chahti ho
ya unki pasand ka?"
Seeta- "Unki pasand ka| Aakhir unka janamdin hai|"
Geeta- "Talaak de do|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-043

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-043
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Pita- "To ab tum samajh gaye ki Raja aur Raashtrapati me kya antar hai?"
Putra- "Haa pitaji| Raja to apne mann ka maalik
hai aur Raashtrapati nahi hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Pita- "Tum hi vah bahadur naujavaan ho, jisne mere
ladke ko nadi me doobne se bachaya tha?"
Naujavaan- "Ji haan, lekin isme fikra ki kya baat hai?"
Pita- "Fikra ki baat kaise nahi hai?
Uski topi kahaan hai?"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Police- "Jab mai paida hua tha to Military waalo ne
ikkees tope chalai thi|"
Chor- "Kamaal hai! Sabka nishaana chook gaya?"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Fire brigade kaaryalay me Netaji ka phone aaya
Netaji- "Jaldi aaye! Hamari party ke daftar me
aag lag gayi hai|"
Fire brigade waale ravaana hone hi lage the ki unhi
Netaji ka phir phone aaya- "Jaldi aane ki koi jarurat
nahi| Jab ji chahe, aaye| Maine vo party chod di hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-044

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-044
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Ek aadmi ki patni mar gayi| Shavdaah ke dauraan patni ka
ek premi badi jor-jor se hichkiya le-lekar rone laga| Pati kuch shan dekhta raha, lekin jab premi ka rona band nahi
hua to vah uske paas pahucha aur saantvanapurna swar me bola-
"Hausla rakho bhai| Mai jaldi hi doosri shaadi kar lunga|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Ticket checker- "Haan, bhai saahab, aapka ticket?"
Yaatri- "Ye lijiye do ticket|"
Checker- "Aapke saath aur kaun hai?"
Yaatri- "Saahab, mai bilkul akela hoon|"
Checker- "To phir yah doosra ticket kiske liye hai?"
Yaatri- "Ji, kahi pehla ticket kho jaye, to doosra kaam
aa jayega aur is prakaar jurmana nahi hoga|"
Checker- "Lekin agar dono kho jaye to?"
Yaatri- "Ussi sthiti se bachne ke liye maine all route paas banvaya hua hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Master- "Deepu, aadamkhor kaun hota hai?"
Deepu- "Mujhe nahi maaloom, master saahab|"
Master- "Agar tum maa-baap ko kha jao to tum kya kehlaoge?"
Deepu- "Yateem|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Adyapak- "Gopal batao, Rekha kise kehte hai?"
Gopal- "Ji, meri badi didi ko|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-045

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-045
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Premi- "Darling, ye soot jo maine pehna hua hai,
Traveling soot hai|"
Premika- "Kaise?"
Premi- "Sabse pehle ise mere dada ne pehna,
phir mere papa ne, ab ise mai pehan raha hoon|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Premika- "Chalte waqt tumhara joota bahut shor
machata hai, shaayad yah chori ka hai?"
Premi- "Agar aisa hota to coat, patloon tatha
hat se bhi aisi aawaje nikalti|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Pita (gusse se)- "Car ka kya karega? Ishwar ne
do taange kisliye di hai?"
Beta- "Break aur eksilator dabane ke liye|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Pati- "Kya baat hai, aadhe ghante me hi phone rakh diya,
baatein karne ko aaj koi topic nahi tha kya?"
Patni- "Wrong number lag gaya tha ji, koi sarla thi|
jaan na pehchaan, usse kya baatein karti?"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-046

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-046
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Inspector- "Jis aadmi ne tumhe maara-pita,
kya tum uska huliya bayaan kar sakte ho?"
Santa- "Inspector saahab, mai uska huliya hi to
bayaan kar raha tha ki usne mujhe peetna shuru kar diya|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Ek aadmi- "Tumhara is ladke se kya rishta hai?"
Ladka- "Ji! bahut door ka rishta hai|"
Aadmi- "Phir bhi kya rishta hai?"
Ladka- "Ji! vah mera saga bhai hai|"
Aadmi- "To tum ise door ka rishta kyu batate ho?"
Ladka- "kyuki iske aur mere beech saat bhai aur hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Ek sharabi airport ke baahar khada tha|
Ek vardhidhaari yuvak udhar se gujra|
Sharabi- "Abe! ek Taxi le aao|"
Yuvak- "Andhe ho kya? Mai Pilot hoon,
Taxi Driver nahi|"
Sharabi- "To naraz kyu hote ho, ek Jumbo Jet le aao|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Saali- "Abhi-abhi maine sapna dekha ki mujhe naukri
mil gayi hai aur mai duty se vaapas aayi hoon|"
Jija- "Isliye tum thaki-thaki najar aa rahi ho|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-047

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-047
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Ek mahila ki aankh sooji thi|
Padosan- "Kya hua?"
Mahila- "Mere pati ne maara|"
Padosan- "Lekin mera khyaal tha ki tumhare pati
Mumbai gaye hue hai|"
Mahila- "Mera bhi yahi khyaal tha|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Sohan- "Meri lakdi ki taang mujhe bahut dukh de rahi hai|"
Ramu- "Kamaal hai| Lakdi ki taang tumhe kaise
dukh de sakti hai?"
Sohan- "Aaj meri biwi ne vah taang mere sir par maar di|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Teacher- "Mujhe hairani hai ki tum akele itni
saari galtiya karte ho|"
Ladka- "Ye saari galtiya maine akele nahi ki sir,
mere papa ne bhi isme meri sahayta ki hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Chota bacha pehle din school gaya| Shaam ko lauta to maa ne poocha- "School kaisa laga?"
Bacha- "School bada acha tha, parantu hamari teacher ko to kuch bhi nahi aata| Aaj mujhse hi poochne lagi ki ek aur ek kitne hote hai, tab mujhe batana pada unhe|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-048

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-048
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Santa- "Mujhe lakhpati banane ka shrey meri patni ko hai|"
Banta- "Acha! Aap pehle kya the?"
Santa- "Crorepati|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Santa- "Kyu bhai, tumhare ghar me to naukrani thi|
Pehle vahi bartan maanjti thi, aaj tum khud bartan kyu maanj rahe ho?"
Banta- "Maine usse shaadi jo kar li hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Bandook chalane ki training di ja rahi thi|
Bandook ki goliya nishaane se idhar-udhar ja rahi thi|
Shikshak cheekha- "Kya kar rahe ho, goliya kaha ja rahi hai?"
Vidhyarthi ne upar dekha aur bola- "Jara dekhiye,
kaha ja rahi hai? Meri bandook se to thik hi nikal rahi hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Pati-patni jhagad rahe the|
Pati- "Tumne to mujhe kutta samajh rakha hai|"
Patni- "Bilkul nahi| Ab bhagwan ke liye bhaukna band karo|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-049

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-049
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Doctor ne rogi ke seene ki jaanch stethoscope se shuru ki hi thi ki unki dukaan me baithe ek baalak ne apni maa se poocha- "Doctor saahab, yah kya kar rahe hai?"
Maa- "Vah uske shareer ke bheetar telephone karke pooch rahe hai ki andar kya-kya marj hai?"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Santa- "Meri Priya se mangni toot gayi hai|
Usne mujhse shaadi karne se inkaar kar diya hai|"
Banta- "Tumne use apne lakhpati chacha ke baare
me nahi bataya?"
Santa- "Bataya tha|...Ab vah meri chachi hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Seeta ne apni saheli Geeta ko apne mangetar se milaya to Geeta boli- "Ladka to thik hai, lekin jab hansta hai to uske ubad-khabad daant bade bure lagte hai|"
Seeta- "To kya hua? Shaadi ke baad mai use
hansne ka mauka kab doongi?"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Ek ladka baal pustakaalay ki adhyaksha ke paas
pahuncha aur chillakar bola- "Ai aurat,
mujhe taur-tarike sikhaane waali pustak do|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-050

SUHANI KE SUHANE HINDI JOKES-050
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Do Neta jhagad rahe the to ek gusse me bola-
"Mujhe maloom hai, tum kiske haatho ki
katputli ho, kaun tumhe nacha raha hai?"
Doosra Neta phunkara- "Khabardar| Jo raajnaitik
bahas me meri biwi ko ghasita to acha nahi hoga|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Santa- "Meri patni ko make up me bada waqt lagta hai|"
Banta- "Bura kya hai?"
Santa- "Jis din picture dekhne jaana hota hai,
mai subah patni se taiyaar hone ke liye bol deta
hoon aur second show ka ticket book kara leta hu|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Maa- "Tum bilkul naalayak ho| Apne pita se hi
tumhe kuch seekh lena chahiye|"
Santa- "Maa, unhone aisa kaun-sa kamaal kar diya hai?"
Maa- "Acha, tumhe maaloom nahi! Ache chaal-chalan
ke kaaran jail waalo ne unki saja maaf kar di|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
'Bharat ek hai|' Vishay par ek netaji apne bhaashan
me bole- "Sajjano, jab mai Punjab gaya to waha log
mujhe dekhkar hansne lage| Jab mai Maharashtra gaya to waha bhi log mujhe dekhkar hansne lage| Jab mai Karnataka gaya to waha bhi log mujhe dekhkar hansne lage| Isse spasht sidh hota hai ki Bharat ek hai|"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Hindi_Jokes
suhanisharma21f@gmail.com
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7.

Chimpanzees Feel Grief For Their Dead

Posted by: "Deepak Punjabi" indigoblue2005@yahoo.com   indigoblue2005

Wed Apr 28, 2010 10:37 am (PDT)





How caring chimps mourn the death of a loved one just like humans

By David Derbyshire

Anyone who has peered into the eyes
of a chimpanzee knows that our closest relatives in the animal kingdom
are intelligent and thoughtful creatures. And now an extraordinary study has shown just how alike we are.
For the first time, scientists have captured on video a group of captive chimps caring for a dying elderly female, Pansy.


Tender: Pansy's 'friends' and family crowd around her - top left in this view - in the final stages of her illness

The researchers say the studies show
that chimps - who share 98.5 per cent of their DNA with humans - have a
'highly developed' awareness of death.

They even believe the research sheds light on the origins of our own attitudes to dying.
€ ¦ 

When the keepers realised
that Pansy - who was thought to have been in her sixties - was close to
death, they gave her painkillers and filmed the group.As Pansy grew weaker, the three other chimps gently lifted her head and shook her shoulders to see if she was dead.€ ¦ Some stroked her head and made her
comfortable. Others kept her clean and checked her regularly to see if
she was still breathing.


Staying close: The chimps remain with Pansy -
seen at bottom left in these pictures - stroking her head and making
her comfortable. They also kept her clean and checked her regularly to
see if she was still breathing

Zookeeper Alasdair Gillies, who
published an account of the mourning with colleagues from Stirling
University, said: 'On the day she died, she crawled
across into her daughter's nest, which was an incredible feat
considering she was close to death.

'I
decided to let the other chimpanzees in so that they could be together
and she could die with dignity. It felt like the right thing to do.

'What followed was incredible. It
was one of the most moving experiences of my life. It looked like they
were comforting her by grooming her intently.
'They behaved just like a group of human friends
would if a friend died.'

Rosie (back), Pansy's daughter, seen here with Chippy, lay beside her mother after she died, holding her body tight

Chippy the chimp in one of the enclosures.
Footage taken at a wildlife park in Scotland showed the animals
apparently comforting terminally ill chimp Pansy in the hours before
she died

Sharing our DNA: Researchers believe the
behaviour of chimps like Chippy shed light on the origins of our own
attitudes towards death

Once they discovered she had stopped breathing, the three left the enclosure.

Pansy's daughter, Rosie, later returned, lay down and slept face to face with her mother for the night.For four weeks the chimps were clearly
depressed. They slept badly and demanded attention from their keepers.
And they refused to sleep on the platform where Pansy had died for five
nights.
Mr Gillies added: 'It was astonishing. When we opened the door after Pansy died,
the atmosphere was eerie, you could cut it with a knife.'

The elderly chimpanzee arrived at
the Blair Drummond Safari and Adventure Park in Stirlingshire in 1979
and lived at the zoo with another mother and child - 60-year-old
Blossom and her 22-year-old son Chippie.

Sad moment: Pansy the chimp, shortly after she died - her family were seen to be mourning for weeks afterwards

Dr Jim Anderson of Stirling
University, a co-author of the paper in Current Biology, said: 'We
found it very difficult to avoid seeing parallels between how we know
human's respond to losing a close companion or family members, and what
the chimps were doing.''This is shedding light on the origins of how humans respond to death today.'
A second study shows how chimpanzees cope with a baby's death.
Researchers,
led by Dr Dora Biro of Oxford University, watched two mothers carry the
bodies of their dead infants with them for weeks - caring and tending
for them like real babies.
The
researchers believe the mothers - studied in the forests surrounding
Bossou, Guinea - used the time to adapt to the death of the infant.
This
behaviour shows just how strong the bond is between chimpanzee mothers
and their offspring, that it carries on even after death.
The
mothers groomed their babies and took them into the nests. Eventually
they allowed others in the group to handle them and tolerating longer
and longer periods of separation.
After a few weeks they allow other infants and young chimps to carry off and play with the mummified corpses.

Click to join desi_pardesi Deepak Punjabi€ ¦ 
Baguio City

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8.

The Colors of Friendship.....J

Posted by: "©Ever Smile J ©" aa_punnagai@yahoo.com   aa_punnagai

Wed Apr 28, 2010 10:48 am (PDT)





€ ¢Â 

Once upon a
time the
colors of the world started to quarrel. All claimed that they were the
best; the
most important, the most useful, the favorite

€ ¢Â 

GREEN
said:

€ ¢â' '¼Clearly I am
the most important. I am the sign of life and of hope. I was

chosen for grass, trees and leaves. Without me, all animals would die.
Look
over the countryside and you will see that I am in the majority.€ ¢â' '½

€ ¢Â 

BLUE
interrupted:

€ ¢â' '¼You only think about the earth, but consider the sky and the sea. It is
the

water that is the basis of life and drawn up by the clouds from the deep
sea.
The sky gives space and peace and serenity. Without my peace, you would
all be
nothing.€ ¢â' '½

€ ¢Â 

YELLOW
chuckled:

€ ¢â' '¼You are all so serious. I bring laughter, gaiety, and warmth into the
world.
The sun is yellow, the moon is yellow, the stars are yellow. Every time
you
look at a sunflower, the whole world starts to smile. Without me there
would be
no fun.€ ¢â' '½

€ ¢Â 

ORANGE
started next to blow her trumpet:

€ ¢â' '¼I am the
color of health and strength. I may be scarce, but I am precious for I
serve
the needs of human life. I carry the most important vitamins. Think of
carrots,
pumpkins, oranges, mangoes, and papayas. I don€ ¢â' '¹t hang around all the
time, but
when I fill the sky at sunrise or sunset, my beauty is so striking that
no one
gives another thought to any of you.€ ¢â' '½

€ ¢Â 

RED
could stand it no longer, he shouted out:

€ ¢â' '¼I am the ruler of all of you. I am blood - life€ ¢â' '¹s blood! I bring fire
into

the blood. I am willing to fight for a cause. I am the color of danger
and of

bravery. Without me, the earth would be as empty as the moon. I am the
color of
passion and of love, the red rose, the poinsettia and the poppy.€ ¢â' '½

€ ¢Â 

PURPLE
rose
up to his full height:

He was very tall and spoke with great pomp: € ¢â' '¼I am the color of royalty
and
power. Kings, cheifs, and bishops have always chosen me, for I am the
sign of
authority and wisdom. People do not question me! They listen and obey.€ ¢â' '½

€ ¢Â 

Finally INDIGO
spoke, much more quietly than all the others, but with just as much
determination: € ¢â' '¼Think of me. I am the color of silence. You hardly
notice me,
but without me you all become superficial. I represent thought and
reflection,
twilight and deep water. You need me for balance and contrast, for
prayer and
inner peace.€ ¢â' '½

€ ¢Â 

So
the colors went on boasting,

each convinced of his or her own superiority.

Their quarreling became louder and louder.

Suddenly there was a startling flash of bright lightening.

Thunder rolled and boomed. Rain started to pour down relentlessly.

The colors crouched down in fear, drawing close to one another for
comfort.

In the midst of the clamor, rain began to speak: € ¢â' '¼You foolish colors,

fighting amongst yourselves, each trying to dominate the rest.

Don€ ¢â' '¹t you know that you were each made for a special purpose,

unique and different? Join hands with one another and come to me.€ ¢â' '½

Doing
as they were told, the colors united and joined hands.

The
rain continued:

€ ¢â' '¼From now on, when it rains, each of you
will
stretch across the sky in a great bow of color as a reminder that you
can all
live in peace.

The Rainbow is a sign of hope for
tomorrow.€ ¢â' '½

And so,
whenever a good rain washes the
world, and a Rainbow appears in the sky, let us remember to appreciate
one
another.

€ ¢Â 

€ ¢Â 

€ ¢Ä±É'°Æ'£É'°uun€ ¢Ô' 

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